The New Way to Build and Maintain Meaningful Friendships as a Busy Woman
Women ask me, "Diane, how do you maintain friendships if you're a busy woman?"
That's what I'm going to talk about today. Not just how to do it, but the new way to build and maintain meaningful friendships as a busy woman.
This is the last blog of a four-part series all about friends, which was sparked by me being vulnerable and sharing how at my 50th birthday (which is in three and a half years), I want to have 50 girlfriends there. I say girlfriends just because I am craving, wanting more, closer female friendships.
Friendships Don't Just Happen
We all know friendships don't just happen. But what do we actually do to make them happy and healthy and meaningful?
I used to think friendships had to be forged over years and years: high school friends, some sports friends, neighbourhood friends.
They don't have to be forged over long dinners, big plans, lots of time. That's also because I don't have a lot of time, and I suspect you don't either.
Because of this, I decided, "Well, I guess I'll be friends with who I can be friends with in the time that I have and in the things that are already happening in life."
For quite a while, I've actually built a lot of friendships:
- Over walks
- Over quick coffees
- Even over voice notes with people who I don't get to see locally because they live further away
How We Normally Build Friendships
1. Put it in your calendar.
If you don't schedule it, it doesn't happen.
That's just the reality of life. Looking at my schedule every week, every few weeks, I think: Where can I plug in these walks, and coffee dates? Where can I invite someone I know to an event with me, or drive with me to an event so we can catch up?
2. Reach Out Without a Reason
Just sending messages like:
- "Hey, I've been thinking about you."
- "Hey, I thought you might like this."
Every time I do that, it's so well received. Sometimes it's "Oh, you were on my heart, and I prayed for you."
This ability to reach out and even connect it to something you've seen before, like sending an impactful article, funny meme, or something that can be inspirational to the person, shows that you're thinking of them and that you care.
3. Be the One Who Initiates
If you've met a cool person and you want to be their friend, initiate. I stopped waiting because I was waiting a long time for people to reach out, and it just wasn't happening.
